self actualization

sadly, today marks a tragic day that one has to acknowledge.
it has been some time coming, and yes, foolishly, i have been
putting the obvious aside for a moments worth of extended happiness.
alas, no more able to face myself for the lies i have been telling
myself time and time again, i, have been forced to realize the
truth that is of my core.

no sympathy needed, i deserve what i have bestowed upon myself.
you can only blame others for so long, but, in the end of the day,
you have to face your own demons. and to continue to deny the
obvious because of some uncomfortable truth, will only prolong the
problem, where, in the end, dare i say, may leave me in a predicament
far worse than one can ever imagine...

today, i threw away all of my size 29 jeans...and some of my size 30
pants too

bwahahahaaaaa